What I learned from X2: X-Men United

Lizard-tongue kids get the last laugh or lick, whatever.

If you're a 'Joe Slob' and totally hot 'babe' in a bar is interested, be suspicious. If she buys you a couple of beers, refuse! If she wants to make out with you in the bathroom, RUN!

Practice, practice, practice your secret military-grade hover-jet piloting.

In these troubled economic times, investment advice can be summed up in one word: Plastics. A second word would be: Admantium (but that one's iffy).

And above all, do NOT mess with art professors (or art students, someone with passing interest in the arts, be they visual arts, performing arts, graphics arts, liberal arts, don't take any chances)!

Smoking is again hazardous to your health.

Get your own zippo lighters,

Don't shoot mutants in the head. It won't work and they might take it personally.

Don't join the military when mutants can be all they can be. You will live longer.

There is no future in weather forecasting anymore.

Also what I learned just before X2:

Don't pick on nerdy scientists who dress in purple pants.

Don't pick on skinny folk who dress in all black and shades.

Don't pick on fictional literary antagonist gentlemen, especially if they team up.

Pshaw, I already learned that one from UXM #180

Which one was that? What happened?

The issue: #183 The huntress: Selene ...

That ticked me off. That guard was a hottie!

I thot The Huntress was a BATMAN character and Selene was Catwoman.

No, Selene goes back a long way in UXM.... You seriously do NOT want to be one of dates.

Her best line EVER as she lies in a bed and calmly uses the phone...

'Room Service? Send me an older bottle of wine and a younger bellboy'

...as we pull back on the shot to see the dessicated smoking husk of a man in the bed next to her, with a bellboys outift on the floor.

1) If the villains lair is inside a Dam, then odds are it will burst, so park stealth jet on high ground

2) If your girlfriend starts exhibiting symptoms including firey eyes, nightmares, and increasing psionic abilities, kill her. She'll get better...

3) Never underestimate bald guys

4) Too much adamantium in the system is a bad thing

5) Having a mutant power involving fire means you are inherantly evil.